Toilet Gator Chapter Notes – Chapter 110


“We shall fight the toilet gator on the beaches.  We shall fight the toilet gator on the landing grounds.  We shall fight the toilet gator in the fields and in the streets.  We shall fight the toilet gator in the hills.  We shall never surrender against the toilet gator.”

Do you think Winston Churchill would approve of his speech being used against a toilet gator?

Toilet Gator Chapter Notes – Chapter 65


Do you think we are set up to fail or is life what we make of it?

Are we doomed to suffer from a thousand decisions that were made before we were born, or can we rise above our circumstances?

Buford was the product of an illicit, late 1980s strip club champagne room session.  His old man is an somewhat absentee father, though he comes around with presents once in awhile.  Roxy is a stripper and as young Buford puts it, a wrasslin’ coach, teaching all sorts of men how to engage in shirtless wrasslin.’

Is a kid born in this terrible environment destined for failure or can he succeed?

The First Toilet Gator Blog Post Ever Written

gator cover

Hey 0.0 readers.

Your new pal, Bookshelf Q. Battler here.  If you happen upon this post, feel free to check out

That’s the blog I run for the purposes of entertaining 3.5 and only 3.5 readers.  Never 5.  Never 100.  3.5 and only 3.5.  If you want to become one of the 3.5, feel free to do so.

A quick explanation about what “Toilet Gator: The Blog!” is all about.  Last year, February of 2017, I began writing a book called “Toilet Gator” which, as you might have surmised, is about a toilet gator…who eats people…while they are sitting on the toilet.

You wouldn’t think a book like that would be worth much, but I felt inspired as I wrote it.  It’s got a lot of heart, there’s a genuine mystery involved, it’s funny if I do say so myself, and did I mention people are eaten on the toilet?

At any rate, “Toilet Gator” is with my editor and I hope to release it in 2019.  I’m also working on sequels as we speak.  From time to time, I’ll drop in with updates and discussions (believe it or not, a book about a toilet gator actually raises a lot of important issues.)

More to come.  Stay tuned.  Oh, and do keep your time on the toilet to a minimum, because, well, you didn’t hear it from me but…toilet gators aren’t fiction.